Focused Friday

Today’s theme in my daily meditations book is about more gratitude, less coveting. Yes, I said coveting. If that doesn’t highlight my twelve years of Catholic education, nothing does. The word means wanting something belonging to someone else. The nuns would really delve into this sin with detailed explanations. Envy is the cause of coveting. Coveting is wanting what your neighbor has. Not something like it, what he has. It could be material things, a job that seems perfect, or even a wife that you think should be yours. It always got tricky for the good sisters to try and explain adultery, we just weren’t supposed to do it, whatever it was. (The other thing they never explained was the meaning of virgin, but I digress).

At any rate, here we are, trying not to covet a neighbor kid’s bike, dolls, hula hoop, parents, or anything about his or her life. I’m unsure if it was envy that struck me while I was a single mom, and I saw how some women I worked with treated their husbands. Not so much Envy as empathy for the husband, being talked about behind his back, being damned for not putting lettuce on the sandwich he made her for lunch, and all the while demeaning him. I often said, “Gee, I’d be glad if someone would make a sandwich for me.” I didn’t understand why some really nice guys could be treated so badly. Of course, there may have been a perfectly good reason for the wife to be as she was. But maybe there wasn’t. I suppose it’s the same reason some really nice women are mistreated by their husbands. They don’t know they deserve better. And that’s a topic for another day.

Photo by Vera Arsic on Pexels.com

After years of going to the office Christmas Party alone, I learned you could tell the couples who were arguing in the car on the way to the Party. It was a formal affair, I loved wearing a gown I created with my trusty sewing machine. Everyone was dressed beautifully. And there were so many who didn’t have a good time. I was grateful to be alone when witnessing that. It can always be worse, and I already left the worse. I would never settle again. Not permanently. Many times, my choices weren’t ever after, and it was ended before it went further. My theory is it takes three years to see exactly how someone is before you can begin to think about if they could be someone you could spend your life with them. I’d never live together before knowing someone three years.

The Babe sold his house after we were engaged, and he moved in about four months before we got married. That worked well. I did think long and hard if I was ready to “give up” some aspects of life alone. Yes, I was. What I’ve gained in the past 22 years is immeasurable. It’s what I was waiting for, warts and all. They happen. He still says he would never think of standing in the way of what I wanted to do, especially with my writing. He says it’s important to him because it’s important to me. He may not understand it, but he supports it. That’s what love looks like, folks. That’s what unconditional love looks like. I’m lucky, so is he. For all this, I’m grateful.

Sounds Easier Than It Is.

The more I write, the more I think about all of the things I’ve had to reject to find the me that was buried for a long time. Some people never get there, some may not want to, some don’t know they need to. I started noticing little things in the 1970s to question. Not big things, just things that were always done a certain way, and nothing changed it all. Something as simple as household products. At that time, my mom always used Tide. She still uses Tide to this day. She has never wavered from Crest toothpaste, either. She was never tempted by a new and improved product. Ever that I remember.

By comparison, my ex-mother-in-law was always trying new products. Shampoo, detergent, soap, you name it, she tried it. I always considered that adventuresome. You never know when you might find something worthwhile. It can be different and still be fine.

The same goes with people. I did not have to be a copy or a clone of my mother. Neither did my daughter need to be me. We each need to find our own person inside, whoever they are. Growing up, the more I questioned, the more resistance I met. When a person becomes who they need to be, it’s met with resistance from those surrounding them. It’s only natural. Besides, if they happen to look at themselves, they may see they’re unhappy in who they are, too.

As I straighten my notes and prepare to write more of my book, which describes the stages a young woman struggles through to become herself, I need to remind myself how fortunate I was to be able to figure out the same things for myself as my character Katie does. The rest of the day will be work, cooking something for a change, and relaxing with the Babe and dogs by the fireplace. I covet nothing. I covet no one. It’s a great place to be.

Thanks for reading, I’ll be back tomorrow. I appreciate your time and hope something wonderful happens for you today. Make it your choice to get the most our of your day, week, and life. It truly is up to you. Be Kind. Be Safe. Be Courteous.

Sunny Saturday

Despite lingering smoke from the wildfires, it is a pretty day outside. It will get hot today and tomorrow, then be more fall-like. I’m ready. So is the Babe. I do like to get the windows and screens cleaned before winter. Maybe in the next couple days. We’ll see. It’s pretty easy with the product from Windex, attach it to the garden hose, then rinse the soap off. I do like clean windows.

The VFW Post 2503 new website is up and working well. I have some new updates for it and hope I can get the hang of how to do everything. If you’d like to see, here is where you need to go. The Babe’s brother-in-law, Brad did the heavy lifting, and I get to learn maintenance. It’s WordPress, just like my blog, so some things will be new to me, some things won’t. I believe it’s a good site with lots of info to be added. Baby Steps!

I wish my daughter and son and law would let us post photos of our beautiful grandkids. I ordered Canvas prints to hang in the living room. Little Cody is such a little man! His reddish blonde hair is finally starting to lay down, up until now, it would stick straight up. He’s trying to walk and has two teeth at the age of 9 months. He is so cute. Miss Kayla Jolee does funny face poses for all of her pics. Her picture is of her standing in her mama’s hiking boots, bent at the knees, hands on thighs, with a toothy grin, eyes scrunched closed, hair messed up. How about that? I think she plays a lot with funny faces, running, and being generally goofy. I cannot wait to see them again!

We have some more pictures to hang, and today we may also hang my Kimonos. They are beautiful. I can’t wait to share them with you. I’m picturing my dad, a young soldier, buying one for my mom when he was on the way home from Korea. It was still in the paper sack it came in, with tissue paper that disintegrated when I picked it up. It’s probably close to 70 years old. Wow. A good example of holding on to something and never using it. That sort of thing has always made me kind of sad. Finally, it will be hung to be enjoyed and admired.

Use the good dishes. Wear perfume every day. Eat the Pie/Cake/Donut/Dessert. I really believe God intended us to enjoy the things He’s given us. Denial is good for times of penance, but not every day for the rest of your life. No, I’ve not lived through a depression, but I’ve seen some recessions and bad economic times. I’m not a tightwad, but I’m not a big spender, either. I have no problem saying how happy seeing certain things makes me. Little babies, toddlers, old people, newlyweds, The Babe, The grandkids, our kids, my brother, grown up cousins, their kids, God’s been so good to me.

Words to apply every day.

More scene-writing today. I’ve always got writing to do. I feel I had a good, productive session yesterday, and hope to duplicate it today. Some things are finally clicking. Yay!

I love how this turned out – finally!

When I finish quilting a couple more quilts, it’ll be time to piece some more. I like to keep ahead of them, right now I have four more to quilt. One to go above our bed, two for the stairwell, one when winter comes, another for spring. One for my chair or the family room in the spring or summer. By then, there should be another king sized quilt made. I’m still cutting one for winter, a snowflake quilt. I think that’ll be my December piecing project, as I’m taking the month off from coaching with Sam.

What might be your plan for the fall? I have some in the house stuff to do and maybe some transplanting in the yard. We always have longer lists than what we can accomplish, don’t we? Part of becoming older, our brains still thing we’re young and capable, our bodies tell us otherwise!

Thank you for reading today, I appreciate it. Dream big! Use the good china, ok? You’re certainly worth it. Be kind to yourself, and to others. Give a kid a chance. Give yourself a break. Let’s cooperate and be courteous. Wash up, Show up, and Mask up. We’re not through this yet. And, get a flu shot. It could save your life.

Sunny Saturday

Despite lingering smoke from the wildfires, it is a pretty day outside. It will get hot today and tomorrow, then be more fall-like. I’m ready. So is the Babe. I do like to get the windows and screens cleaned before winter. Maybe in the next couple days. We’ll see. It’s pretty easy with the product from Windex, attach it to the garden hose, then rinse the soap off. I do like clean windows.

The VFW Post 2503 new website is up and working well. I have some new updates for it and hope I can get the hang of how to do everything. If you’d like to see, here is where you need to go. The Babe’s brother-in-law, Brad did the heavy lifting, and I get to learn maintenance. It’s WordPress, just like my blog, so some things will be new to me, some things won’t. I believe it’s a good site with lots of info to be added. Baby Steps!

I wish my daughter and son and law would let us post photos of our beautiful grandkids. I ordered Canvas prints to hang in the living room. Little Cody is such a little man! His reddish blonde hair is finally starting to lay down, up until now, it would stick straight up. He’s trying to walk and has two teeth at the age of 9 months. He is so cute. Miss Kayla Jolee does funny face poses for all of her pics. Her picture is of her standing in her mama’s hiking boots, bent at the knees, hands on thighs, with a toothy grin, eyes scrunched closed, hair messed up. How about that? I think she plays a lot with funny faces, running, and being generally goofy. I cannot wait to see them again!

We have some more pictures to hang, and today we may also hang my Kimonos. They are beautiful. I can’t wait to share them with you. I’m picturing my dad, a young soldier, buying one for my mom when he was on the way home from Korea. It was still in the paper sack it came in, with tissue paper that disintegrated when I picked it up. It’s probably close to 70 years old. Wow. A good example of holding on to something and never using it. That sort of thing has always made me kind of sad. Finally, it will be hung to be enjoyed and admired.

Use the good dishes. Wear perfume every day. Eat the Pie/Cake/Donut/Dessert. I really believe God intended us to enjoy the things He’s given us. Denial is good for times of penance, but not every day for the rest of your life. No, I’ve not lived through a depression, but I’ve seen some recessions and bad economic times. I’m not a tightwad, but I’m not a big spender, either. I have no problem saying how happy seeing certain things makes me. Little babies, toddlers, old people, newlyweds, The Babe, The grandkids, our kids, my brother, grown up cousins, their kids, God’s been so good to me.

Words to apply every day.

More scene-writing today. I’ve always got writing to do. I feel I had a good, productive session yesterday, and hope to duplicate it today. Some things are finally clicking. Yay!

I love how this turned out – finally!

When I finish quilting a couple more quilts, it’ll be time to piece some more. I like to keep ahead of them, right now I have four more to quilt. One to go above our bed, two for the stairwell, one when winter comes, another for spring. One for my chair or the family room in the spring or summer. By then, there should be another king sized quilt made. I’m still cutting one for winter, a snowflake quilt. I think that’ll be my December piecing project, as I’m taking the month off from coaching with Sam.

What might be your plan for the fall? I have some in the house stuff to do and maybe some transplanting in the yard. We always have longer lists than what we can accomplish, don’t we? Part of becoming older, our brains still thing we’re young and capable, our bodies tell us otherwise!

Thank you for reading today, I appreciate it. Dream big! Use the good china, ok? You’re certainly worth it. Be kind to yourself, and to others. Give a kid a chance. Give yourself a break. Let’s cooperate and be courteous. Wash up, Show up, and Mask up. We’re not through this yet. And, get a flu shot. It could save your life.